Hard Question #632

thalia

Today, I found myself at a loss for words while trying to cheer up the weeping Aina. I was speechless, and all I could do was hug her and kiss her, while I was racking my brain to answer one of the most difficult questions aina ever asked me:

Death. My death.

During lunch, Aina asked, “Binggi, when I grow up, will you get old?”

Not realizing that it was a booby trap, I said, “Yep, kinda like your grandma.”

“But… but…”, her voice started to tremble, “When you get old, I will not be able to see the young binggi anymore, right? What happen if i miss the young binggi?”

Uh oh, my alarm beeped a warning sign. But it was too late… After being upset about not being able to see the young version of me, she went on and dropped the bomb, “Binggi, when you get old, you will die, right?”

Then, she lifted her hands to cover her face and started to weep, struggling to say, “But I don’t want you to die… I want to be with you forever…”

I was very touched but i also started to panick at the same time. the hugs and the kisses didn’t do much. She couldn’t stop crying. She looked devastated. So, I have to come up with some sort of a reassurance. and, of course, I can’t lie and say I’ll live forever…

First try: the fact

“Aina, I’m not gonna die until I’m very, very old. and that’s going to be a long time from now. Looooooooong time!”

She looked at me, so I continued, “You know oma tua (her great grandma)? She’s still alive, right? Maybe I can be like oma tua, you know… you’ll have kids, I’ll still be with you. And your kids will have kids, I’ll still be with you… I’ll be with you for a veeeeery long time.”

“…but, I want to be with you forever,” huge tears were falling from her eyes.

Okay, that doesn’t work. And I’m putting my thinking cap…

Second try: the spiritual approach

“Aina, you know the Holy Spirit, right?”, I asked.

She nodded. Aina does the “in the name of the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit” every night for her prayers.

“Later, when I die, which is a very long time from now, I will turn to be like the holy spirit, and stay with you right here,” I point to her chest, “and I will be with you forever. I’ll never leave you and follow you wherever you go… trust me.”

Her biiiig eyes stared at me, and the tears are still flooding, “But I don’t want you to die… ever!”

Hmm, that doesn’t work either. Another hug, then.

Intermezzo:

All the sudden, she said, “Binggi, I also don’t want to have a husband.”

“Why? What do you mean?”

“I don’t want to get married and have a real husband. Pretend husbands are okay, though.”

“Like snowy 2?”, Snowy 2 is her current pretend husband, the father of Snowy, the white stuffed dog that goes with her everywhere. She said, snowy is her daughter.

“Yes, snowy 2 is fine. But I don’t want to have a human husband.”

I was a bit confused, but I figured, her statement must have something to do with the previous topic. So i asked, “Why? Is it because after Binggi and Bubu get married, we don’t live with our moms and dads anymore?”

She nodded and hugged me tighter, “I want to be with you forever!”

I melted. Is it weird if I started to cry, too?

Third try: my kid is a pragmatic thinker

“You know, baby… I will try my best to live and be with you as long as I can, I promise. you know that a lot of people die from sickness right? “

She looked at me and nodded.

“So, I will try to stay healthy. I’ll run to keep fit. We ride our bikes to keep moving. I’ll eat healthy food, and you’ll help me cook it. I will try my best not to get sick so I can be with you… okay?”

Surprisingly, she nodded. Maybe she feels that she can help me stay alive (by peeling the garlic during cooking and carrying the necessary ingredients from the fridge to the counter). She still looks sad but the third try stopped her from crying.

So I asked her, “So, is that okay if I try to keep healthy?”

She nodded again.

“Are you still sad?”

She nodded.

“Do you want to watch some movies to cheer ourselves up?”

“Yes!”, a hint of a smile.

After rummaging through our DVDs, she picked The Wizard Of Oz, and she stopped crying and was back to normal during the movie. yay!

44 Comments

  1. aniwul
    Anita Wulandari July 26, 2012 at 7:47 am

    Awww what a sweet story (˘̩̩̩-˘̩̩̩ƪ)

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:45 am

      thank you! :) waktu itu sih berderai air mata… hihihi.

  2. charissarhanie
    rani nurcharissa July 26, 2012 at 7:59 am

    awwww… maybe I should prepare myself too for this.. who knows? :’)

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:46 am

      i think it’ll come someday… tapi ga tau kapan. mending siap2 ran, daripada ketohok tiba2… hihihi.

  3. Shinta_daniel
    Shinta Daniel July 26, 2012 at 8:19 am

    poor aina, soo touchy, hope she’s getting better.. **tears drop :”(

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:47 am

      she’s okay now. she still doesn’t want to get married, but i’m sure that will change later, most likely in her teens ;)

  4. oci
    Oci Rajagukguk Dewono July 26, 2012 at 8:27 am

    :’( Aina pemikirannya jauh bgt ya Binggi.. So smart!

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:49 am

      haha, kayaknya pertanyaan (dan pernyataan) semua anak2 suka ajaib dan dateng tiba2… bikin ortunya gelagapan.

  5. otty
    Pangastuti Sri Handayani July 26, 2012 at 8:46 am

    Aina makin besar makin pinter, pertanyaannya makin susah! Harus siap2 1-2 taun lagi jangan2 Nara juga udah nanya yang beginian…

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:50 am

      iya, ty… ati2 nih, ini pertanyaan bakal dateng someday… jebakan banget!

  6. sukie
    Sukma Pertiwi July 26, 2012 at 9:30 am

    terharuu.huhuhu.btw kenapa #632 ya? itu jumlah pertanyaan Aina kah?

    oiya btw gue aja skrg masih ada perasaan pengen sama nyokap terus.huhuhu

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:52 am

      hihihi, sebenernya random number, tapi emang pertanyaan susah dia ada banyaaaaaak banget. cuma ini salah satu yang bikin gue beneran speechless.

      tapi seneng deh baca komen sukie kalo masih pengen ama nyokap. semoga aina juga gitu… (hihihi, emak2 selfish).

  7. Tika Dana
    Tika Dana July 26, 2012 at 10:16 am

    pengen nangis dan merinding lho aku….
    ngebayangin percakapan Binggi sama Aina!!! bisa jawab kaya gini ga ya kl si Berlynn punya pertanyaan yg sama???? huahuahua

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:54 am

      hahaha, waktu itu aku juga berurai air mata… terharu dan panik… ati2 lho, kayaknya ampir tiap anak bakal nanya yang kayak gini deh. dulu aku juga… hihihi.

  8. namila
    namila July 26, 2012 at 10:18 am

    Rrr kind of rendevous baca ini….*hapusairmatalagi* peluk buat binggi yg sukses melaluinya.
    Rasanya antara bahagia/terharu karena kita di’minta’ ada terus, pengin ketawa, panik mesti menyusun penjelasan yang mudah dicerna, akhirnya pendekatan saya perihal surga juga. Ibu akan menunggu di surga dan kita akan ketemu kembali dan akan tinggal bersama selamanya.

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:56 am

      iya bener! perasaannya campur aduk, antara seneng, bangga, terharu, ama panik karena ga bisa nenangin si anak.

      dan pas si anak udah bisa nerima penjelasannya, rasanya legaaaaa banget. kayak baru lulus dengan angka bagus. hihihi.

  9. mommil
    Andina Tirta July 26, 2012 at 10:27 am

    Mba thalia bikin iri deh (˘̩̩̩⌣˘̩̩̩)
    klo aina sampe berfikir seperti itu berarti u’re a very special mother..
    I wish I can be like u *hope so*

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:58 am

      aww, thank you! i’m sure nanti anakmu juga akan nanya hal yang sama kok. aku yakiiiin banget! :D

  10. Kira Kara
    Bunda Wiwit July 26, 2012 at 11:08 am

    Smart Aina.. Smart Binggi.. :)

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:58 am

      hihihi, amiiiin!

  11. bundacarissa
    EKA WULANDARI July 26, 2012 at 11:37 am

    huhuhu.. speechless bacanya :’(

    1. August 3, 2012 at 10:59 am

      hihihi, aku juga speechless waktu itu. panik banget ngatur2 jawaban… XD

  12. syahdiar
    aulia syahdiar July 26, 2012 at 11:51 am

    then you’re a very special person for her, no matter what your answer. hope could have a relation like yours with my daughter

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:01 am

      i’m sure it is :) mother is always the most special person for their children. dan ati2 aja, ntar bakal ada pertanyaan2 kayak gini… :)

  13. ernanrea
    ernanrea July 26, 2012 at 11:52 am

    hmmm, can i copy your answer when Leia or Ryu put me in the same situation? (well, with expectation they react the same as smart Aina) hehehehe….. love it, you both bond really well obviously…..

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:02 am

      silakaaan! tapi ga janji leia ama ryu bakal satisfied ama jawaban yang ini lho! hihihi.

  14. mrs doyi
    indah nildha July 26, 2012 at 7:38 pm

    menyentuh sekali… sweet aina… smart binggi…

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:06 am

      aww, thank you! drama ibu anak, hihihi.

  15. sLesTa
    shinta lestari July 27, 2012 at 8:57 am

    walopun udah baca di blog elo, baca lagi, tetep terharu dehh… waktu dulu pas baca, naia belom nanya kayak gini ke gue. she did a few months ago, untung udah ada contekannya hhihihi..

    mari hidup sehat!

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:07 am

      wah naia udah nanya ya? hihihi. emang umurnya kali ya?

  16. eka
    Eka Wulandari Gobel July 27, 2012 at 3:14 pm

    hwaa.. terharu :( sweet aina
    yiuuk..hidup sehat!

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:08 am

      yak, mari kita hidup sehaaaat! :D

  17. nule
    nule July 28, 2012 at 12:30 pm

    So touching… I hope i’ll have that kind if relationship too one day with asha. Sweet aina..

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:09 am

      i’m sure you will :) mother/child’s bond is always that strong… tapi siap2 aja jawab pertanyaan kayak gini, hehe.

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:10 am

      iya, mari hidup sehat demi kita dan anak! hup hup! :D

  18. andin
    Andini Yulina Pramono July 29, 2012 at 11:08 am

    nangiiiss bacanya…hikkss…
    kiss kiss aina :*

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:12 am

      aww, makasii andin :D hihihi.

  19. Honey Josep
    Honey Josep July 30, 2012 at 10:26 am

    Aina is so sweet :)

    *peluk binggi, peluk Aina*

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:12 am

      *group hug sama honey*

  20. finda.rismayanti
    finda.rismayanti August 2, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    great question from a great daughter for a great mom… #mewek

    1. August 3, 2012 at 11:13 am

      aww, makasiiiii!!! *hug*

  21. dianapuspasari
    diana puspasari August 10, 2012 at 7:39 am

    ga bosen baca cerita binggi n aina yang ini.. terharu #mewek…suatu saat mungkin anak aq bisa nanyain pertanyaan yang sama..

    *bighug for aina*

  22. ayupermatadewi
    Ayu Permata Dewi November 30, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    ya ampun, just read this..Ainaa, super cute *sambilmbrebesmili* … jadi kebayang anakku Audrey yang kalo liat mamanya dipeluk orang lain bisa nangis jejeritan..

Post a Comment

You must be logged in to post a comment.